What is “pass her by”? I see it’s usually “pass by someone”.

See: [https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pass%20by](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pass%20by)

You could say life passed her by and she didn't marry or have kids. We were talking so much that midnight passed us by and we only realised the new year had come at 1am Its a poetic phrase to say time has passed and we missed something or didn't notice.

It's a separable phrasal verb which works in several overlapping ways. Here, it conveys the sense of failing or refusing to engage with something or someone (over the course of what could be a brief or extended window of opportunity); this is nearly always present when the components are separated and the person (protagonist) is the subject. "He passed her by without a second glance – not out of malice, but because he was still in love with his ex." When the person (protagonist) is the object, when something passes them by, then the person is either oblivious, hesitant, or ineffective in interacting with or attaining something. "The opportunities for promotion always passed him by; what did not pass him by were the expectations of his wife and family for him to advance his career." When the parts are together, there can be more ambiguity. "I passed by the church on the way to school. I also passed by the church when considering my future career, until, aged forty, I finally heard the call, accepted my vocation, and trained to become a priest. Except for me, the church had passed by my family, like an insignificant feature in the landscape as they rode along the secular highway."

https://youtu.be/PTKEiQHHsuk