Can you tell me the essence of a word "tomboy"?

Honestly, this is a weird one and, as you say, the term seems to be contradictory. Even Wikipedia says its etymology likely suggests that its usage has changed drastically over time. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomboy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomboy) It's really just one of those weird ones that there isn't any real rhyme or reason to, at least in a modern sense.

According to [https://keywords.nyupress.org/childrens-literature/essay/tomboy/](https://keywords.nyupress.org/childrens-literature/essay/tomboy/), the meaning of Tomboy changed from "rude, boisterous boy" to "girl who behaves likes a boisterous boy" by around the year 1600. We have enough written texts to establish that the change was made but there doesn't seem to be enough information as to *why* the change was made.

Not every word can be understood by breaking it down into components. Even the word 'understand' is a good example - what does comprehending a concept have to do with where someone stands? Just because it appears to be a simple compound word doesn't mean you can understand it as such. In the case of 'tomboy' it originally meant a boisterous, rude, out of control young man, but eventually was repurposed to refer to women or girls who were perceived to have those qualities. Over hundreds of years the originally meaning has been obscured.

Sometimes old words in English end up with a usage unrelated to the original meeting, and I think tomboy might be one of those. In usage the meaning is a woman, particularly a younger girl, that engages in play/activities that are generally considered for boys. For example: "I have two daughters, one likes flowers and dressing up, and anything pink. She loves to act like a princess, bake cookies, and play with her dolls. My other daughter is a real tomboy - she likes to play in the dirt, plays ball with the neighborhood boys, collects bugs, and I couldn't get her in a dress to save my life! Anytime I give her new clothes, before I can even turn around it seems like she's gotten it stained or ripped. My two daughters couldn't be more different!"

As a general tip: what you are asking about is the **etymology** of that word. Its origins; where the word comes from. So if you search with google for "tomboy etymology", you will find information about it. I am giving you that advice, so that next time you want to know where a word comes from, you will know what to search for. "<word> etymology". In this case, searching for tomboy etymology shows us this page on Wikipedia, which explains the history of the word, and has references to the Oxford English Dictionary and other sources... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomboy#Origins

A “tomboy” is a term that describes a girl or woman who exhibits more masculine traits than is expected, often this label is self-applied and isn’t seen as overtly offensive, but can be depending on context. It seems like a play on the word “Tom cat” which means “male cat,” but usually one that isn’t neutered. At least, that’s my understanding. The term was much more popular a couple decades ago, and is slowly going away due to the gradual societal acceptance of differing from gender norms.

As a general tip: what you are asking about is the **etymology** of that word. Its origins; where the word comes from. So if you search with google for "tomboy etymology", you will find information about it. I am giving you that advice, so that next time you want to know where a word comes from, you will know what to search for. "<word> etymology". In this case, searching for tomboy etymology shows us this page on Wikipedia, which explains the history of the word, and has references to the Oxford English Dictionary and other sources... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomboy#Origins

Back in the 1550s, "tomboy" just referred to a rude, wild, boisterous boy. "Tomrig" existed as the girl version. "Tomboy" shifted to refer to generally immodest women in general around 1579. One way to think of it is that the "boyishness" implied a rougher rowdiness that was absent in tomrig. It was only at the onset of the 1600s the meaning of "girl that acts like a boy" solidified.

Back in the 1550s, "tomboy" just referred to a rude, wild, boisterous boy. "Tomrig" existed as the girl version. "Tomboy" shifted to refer to generally immodest women in general around 1579. One way to think of it is that the "boyishness" implied a rougher rowdiness that was absent in tomrig. It was only at the onset of the 1600s the meaning of "girl that acts like a boy" solidified.

Back in the 1550s, "tomboy" just referred to a rude, wild, boisterous boy. "Tomrig" existed as the girl version. "Tomboy" shifted to refer to generally immodest women (harlots) around 1579. One way to think of it is that the "boyishness" implied a rougher rowdiness that was absent in tomrig. It was only at the onset of the 1600s the meaning of "girl that acts like a boy" solidified.

Honestly, as a native English speaker, this word is definitely weird and contradictory (English is freaking weird). A better word would probably be "tomgirl", because the term "tom" implies the subject (who is not male) acts in a boyish manner. But for some reason, the colloquial term to define a masculine female is "tomboy"; very weird indeed. I'd certainly like to have a word with the chap who was responsible for THAT one.

Wdym the "essence?"

To me, the part 'Tom' refers to a male cat. A boy is what the girl wants to be. Hence the word Tomboy. This is all I can make of this for you. I hope this makes sense.

I don’t think people will continue using this anymore as the next generations are more in tune with the fluidity and flexibility of gender expression. Playing outside and getting dirty is no longer only (or mainly) a boy activity. It’s completely acceptable for girls to play sports and do daring things like climb trees and skateboard, as examples.

interesting thread! is the word obsolete? i feel like it is.

The meaning of tomboy has drifted a lot over time. It used to mean a rude or outgoing boy, but then it started getting applied to girls with similar traits. A girl who is rude and loud *like* boy was a tomboy girl. But as time went on it started getting used for girls who are somewhat masculine and stopped getting used for boys at all.

The etymology of that one is going to confuse you more, "tom-" as a prefix essentially has no meaning in modern English.

Just to speak to your usage of tomfool. As a native speaker from Canada, I have not encountered tomfool. It does exist but is, to my knowledge, extremely antiquated and not in common parlance. Tomfoolery, which is behaviour that is silly, playful or foolish, seems to come from tomfool. Two things to note; tomfoolery is much more recent and still sees use, although mostly in situations that aren't serious. Also tomfool does no seem be related to tomboy, as tomfool is a permutation of the name Thom (as in Thomas) Foole (or Fool, as in a court jester), used to refer generally to court jesters and possibly descending from a real or semi-fictitious person. The Tom is tomboy comes from another origin altogether, as others have explained.

With tomfool, you're only going to see it like that in old writing, like from the 17th century. If people use it today, they say "tomfoolery," to mean that someone was doing misch acts.

A lot of English words aren't logical. They might have begun as foreign words, or as slang. Trying to figure out where they came from can be fun, but you may not learn anything that can be applied to other words, even similar ones. Since you asked for the "essence" of the word, and I would say picture [this kid](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/static/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2015/7/7/1436272998508/a582be18-8466-4fbb-b6b7-ffa9bf5ac254-1646x2040.jpeg?width=1140&dpr=2&s=none&crop=none) (Scout from *To Kill a Mockingbird*) It's an informal word for a girl who acts like a boy in the sense that she isn't delicate or afraid to play hard and get dirty. It's often applied to children, but an adult can also be a tomboy, though it implies a youthful energy. It isn't an insult— if you apply it incorrectly, the worst that will happen is that someone will disagree.

The opposite of a "tomboy" is a "femboy," so I understand your confusion. The idea is that tomboys are mostly young girls or teenage girls, like Scout Finch from To Kill A Mockingbird. They outgrow the attributes and become feminine as adults. Well, except for now in the modern day when there are tomboy adult women, who occasionally can be called "butch" (but ONLY if they are lesbian or bisexual). "Femboys" are boys or adult men who dress in a very feminine style without being considered drag queens. Think like a stereotypical gay man, though femboys don't have to be gay.

Tomboy is just a word. Native speakers don't think of it as other words put together, it's just a word for little girls who have more masculine personality traits. Same with tomfoolery. It's just a word. 

Tomboy means a girl who engages in typically largely boy-associates activities. For example going hunting and fishing, helping their father with repairs around the house, and things of that nature. There used to be a lot more negative connotations to the term than there are today.

Tom is a word for a male cat, so maybe thats something to do with it. In any case, lots of times while you *can* chart the connections between words, and it is something I encourage you to do since its often very productive, English is old. Once upon a time you could probably connect the dots for any given word, but alot of times the other words that the components get their meaning from have either changed to be completely unrelated to the phrase or have just fallen out of use completely. "tomboy" today reads as one word. I'm sure once upon a time it might have made more sense, but it doesn't anymore.

Tom kinda means a guy so Tomboy just means one of the boys/guys and started be used for girl that were like boys It’s an old slang that stuck so now we’ll say she’s one of the guys Tomboy in the US South its a girl that’s not a girlygirl

Don't overthink it, and don't try to analyze the word by taking it apart. It's best to just take its meaning and go with it. To my generation (Gen X), a "tomboy" is simply a girl who does not come off as girlish, and is more apt to engage in activities not associated with girlishness. Obviously there's a lot of room for interpretation here, based on what you think "girlish" means. Apparently to older generations it was more negative, and focused more specifically on girls being openly defiant of the social expectations of their time. I gather that at least some younger people understand it to be more about overt masculinity. It's not a word I often hear anymore.

It’s when boys think a girl is to masculine 

Historically "tom" has referred to men and women in various words and is described in OED as "a generic representative of a certain type of person, typically in combination with another word or phrase which denotes or alludes to a feature or characteristic". While tomboy at one time did refer to a boisterous male, at that time the female equivalent was a tomrigg, so the etymon "tom" was seemingly doing some of the 'boisterous' part of the meaning-making as it was applied to words for men and women. It's possible that there was a combination of associations/connotations firstly with 'tom-' in the sense of 'a typical [x]', along with another meaning: a very large bell that could be heard for miles around, also called a tom. This is pure speculation on my part, but in the absence of an authoritative source, a suggestion is better than nothing. I have posed your question to the wise folk over in r/etymology but so far no new additional information has come to light. 😁

Native speaker here. Idk this one confuses me too. Its just one of those things 🤷‍♀️

A tomboy is an ungirly girl. A ladyboy is a girly boy. Is an ungirly boy then a ladygirl?

The only "logical" way I've ever interpreted it (though this is my own headcannon) is: Tom; boy It's like a heterogeneous repetition - she's a "boy boy", but a bit more playful OR mocking than just saying she's "boy-like". I don't know the real etymology here, but that's how it struck me.